Comments on: “Me Time,” “Them Time,” And The Big Picture

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Fri, 25 Dec 2009 17:26:06 +0000

Hi Karl — yes, I think that expresses the point well, that seeing the things we do as ultimately our own choices is much more empowering than seeing them as obligations.

By: Karl Staib - Work Happy Now

Karl Staib - Work Happy Now — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 01:42:28 +0000

We think that many of the things that we have to do is something that we can’t escape, but really we are making a choice. It’s these choices that we need to empower ourselves with.

Perspective is so very important. When we find a way to connect with what we have to do, we stop thinking of it as a “have to” and more as a “want to”.

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 22:58:17 +0000

Thanks Mark — I like that way of putting it — that it may seem easier for us to treat everything we do as “them time” and play the victim role, but it’s actually easier for us to take the bigger-picture view and let go of a lot of that suffering.

By: Mark

Mark — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 18:11:52 +0000

Chris,
Excellent article! I agree it is a matter of perspective. You are very correct in the fact that many people choose not to be aware for they beleive that ignorance is bliss … if they only knew the real bliss that awareness brings!

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:50:03 +0000

Hi Megan — I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Yes, I can definitely feel that sense of ego gratification whenever I find myself slipping into a mindset where everything I do is an obligation or “doing what I’m supposed to do.” It’s seductive but ultimately causes more suffering.

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:45:08 +0000

Hi Patricia — it sounds like you’ve shifted your view of decorating the tree from an obligation to something you actually want to do, and this is serving as a source of motivation. That sounds like a very useful perspective.

I’m really glad you’re enjoying the book and I’m looking forward to reading your review — it sounds like you’ve really found some value in the book, and that’s definitely what I want to bring people with it.

By: Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord

Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 13:04:19 +0000

Chris, what an awesome post. As I read it I thought, “Yes, isn’t that so true that our egos are so narrow and limiting; they always want to create some sort of victim situation.” As you said, the bigger picture and reframing things does allow us a new view. Maybe a “better” view (although it’s all a matter of opinion).

This is really great and I may have to share it with a few people I know. Well done!

By: Patricia

Patricia — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 21:56:08 +0000

Very nice post and yes I do think it is a matter of perspective…it is me time as I am mindfully decorating the Christmas tree because I want to have my Children come home for the holiday and bring their friends and find meaning in the experience…nice reminder

I have put your book aside to prepare for 11 visitors for the next 10 days…I am enjoying it immensely, reading it on my KINDLE and planning on doing a review in January…very helpful in assisting me in sorting out what I have (assets) what is worrisome (unnecessary clutter) and where I need to pursue ( path finding) great clarity in the exercises. Thank you

By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 17:35:06 +0000

Hi Wilma — yes, I can definitely relate to that experience — I feel more respect for myself when I see myself as choosing my circumstances rather than being a martyr or doing what I “should” do. The sense that I’m a victim and others owe me for what I’ve done really doesn’t compare to that.

By: Wilma Ham

Wilma Ham — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 02:32:19 +0000

Hi Chris.
This is interesting and realtes for me to choosing.
You either choose the things you do or you do not and then get into trouble!
This shows me again to watch for going on automatic and then grumble about the things I find myself doing.
What you say here is to become aware and be aware that you are in charge of what you do and that makes for a powerful life?
There is no power when I hear myself complaining about why I have to do what I have to do, I feel really good when I feel I have chosen what I am doing.
I do have noticed that complaining and resisting tasks actually make me tired, interesting and so worth paying attention to, isn’t it? After all we are not slaves or prisoners but free human beings you would think.
It also gives me more self esteem, to feel I choose to do what I am doing, hmmm.